Spring Break For Mama

So the boys are on Spring Break this week, and we haven't done a damn thing. It's my thinking that not having to go to school is break enough, but my mom has a great ability for making me feel I'm not doing enough for them. Marcie and I have decided that she is my event coordinator (Julie from Love Boat) - not really that she gets involved in my stuff - she doesn't. It's just that I have guilt when she says things like "I just thought if you___________, then the boys would feel like they had a vacation." My response? "They're not in school for 9 days!" I'M gonna be the one in need of a vacation! They're in 2nd & 4th grade. They still get reccess every day for crying out loud! My idea of a good day is when I get the laundry done, the dishes put away, no calls from the principle, no animal by-products left on the floor, no bills in the mail, am nice to my students at work, and get a nap. Mama needs a vacation! Which got me to thinking that the last time I went on a bonifide vacation - sans children - was in April 2004 when I went out to L.A. to see friends. The time before that was 1999 when I went with my ex to New York. And believe me when I say that weren't no vacation. Other than that was when the boys were 3 & 4 1/2, and we all know that is defined as a "family vacation," and there is no time for anything that doesn't revolve around tantrums, naps, and ice cream. So where do I want to go? Someplace warm, with warm water, and sun, and not too many hot people beause I'll just feel like a blob in a swimsuit. A little bit of time where I don't have to get up and do something for someone by a certain time. A periodic jaunt back to the days of selfish indulgence. Marcie mentioned the other day what it's like for people who don't have kids. That they are free. Oh, just a moment of that! It goes without saying that my kids matter more to me than anything, but just a day would be nice. But then I have to wonder - could I really enjoy myself? Would I worry that I'm being selfish? Of course I would. I'm a selfish person! But I'd somehow manage to plug through. (get the irony?) This is all just wishful thinking, however. Roxy is only three months old, and my chances for a vacation are next to nill for the next year, at least. BUT! Sometime in August, Marcie and I are planning a day long outting to a neighboring college town to go fabric shopping and what ever else strikes our fancy. Two daddy's - alone with seven kids! Even if we are wrestling with guilt, I bet we stick it out - if for nothing else than the humor factor. Oh it's just so wrong, but it's not going to stop us!